Mine, Cheryl’s and Alice’s birthday party in Dalston last Friday was pretty awesome. The DJs and bands were excellent (big shout out to We Are Not A Rockband for kicking off with Yacht – Psychic City (Classixx Remix) and for basically playing loads of my favourite tunes) so massive thank yous and love yous to everyone involved in that side of things. The decor in The Victory was excellent- especially the larger-than-life-size posters of me, Alice and Cheryl! I later found mine ripped up, screwed up and covered in beer <sad face>. The after-party I went to/was thrown for me was suitably debauched. I spent most of it wearing a crown and behaving badly. Standard. Actually I also tried to rescue my poster but it has since been thrown away. From all accounts it was as trashed as I was- crumpled and beer soaked. An accurate representation of me come Saturday. Check out my little image gallery of some pictures I stole from friends. You can see mine and Cheryl’s posters in the first pic ^_^

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***Pictures courtesy of Cheryl May & Geeta Gill***

So me and my two friends Cheryl & Alice are having a sick joint birthday party this Friday with all of friends (and sibling in Cheryl’s case!) djing and performing… and somehow that parralell universe where we are all super-hip, popular and just that fucking cool has become reality as TimeOut have written about our party. No word of a lie. Click [here] to read.

The lineup is pretty awesome, with all my favourite boys turning in favours, from my pals The Dirty Toyz [here] to my fellow music bloggers We Are Not A Rockband [here] to the always excellent “forward thinking cunty bollocks” * of Potty Mouth Disco [here].
I just know I’m going to dance my arse off. It’s going to be FUCKING SICK.

Click [here] to see the social event of June!

* “cunty bollocks” quote courtesy of Ben Scales

***Image courtesy of Chaz John Ross***

Yes kids it’s that super-secret-shoreditch-warehouse-party time again! The Coolness are at it again, this time with the LP launch for Lost In A Disco at their night Club Cool this Friday night. Having proof-read the lyrics for the entire elbum, I can tell you exclusively that it’s all highly sexualised. Click [here] for The Coolness’s Facebook page. Other acts include my boys The Dirty Toyz who are worth the door price alone. You can check out their Facebook page [here].

Club Cool is always worth a bash, although admittedly I have *very* few memories of the last party, the Freddie Mercury one back in January. Which, from what I’ve heard of my behaviour, is probs for the best. Holy Rave back in December I do actually remember all of and it was AMAZING! Join the Club Cool group [here] to hear all about their parties before I blog about it.

Buy tickets to Friday nights party [here] before they all sell out and click attending on the Facebook event [here]!

***Image courtesy of Chaz Ross/The Coolness***

Thursday saw a trip to the Double R Club at Bethnal Green which I highly recommend if you’re a Twin Peaks fan. I went along with two of my fellow Lynch-Lock-In pals (click [here] for my previous blogpost about watching the entirety of Twin Peaks over the course of 32 hours straight) andf we had a smashing time. The burkha cabaret act called “Winners Of Baghdad’s Got Talent” was probs the one that sticks in my memory the most for sheer google-eyed giggly times. After this we went to a rave in a car park and then a house party. Fun times! Check out the Double R’s Facebook group [here].

Friday was Potty Mouth Disco which due to a venue change was a tad on the empty side. Actually the quietest I’ve ever seen it. Which sadly meant they shut the second room really early. Gessafelstein also wasn’t able to make it which meant that Thomas Von Party (aka Tiga’s little brother) played a 4 hour set. IT WAS AMAZING. He played so many songs that I really wish I knew the name of. I highly recommend checking him out. Click [here] for Potty Mouth Disco’s Facebook group. The after-party I attended was extra-excellent full and of awesome people playing amazing songs to each other. Intense but good.

And Saturday night was much of the same.

Sunday was the week’s second trip to the hipster hang-out of choice, London Fields for a friends leaving bbq. Awesome awesome awesome time.

Normally after a weekend of this magnitude I go through my phone and a whole batch of ridiculously awful and blurry and embarrassing photos I have to delete but this time I just have notes saved with song names so I thought I’d share with you all a couple of choice picks.

Yacht- Psychic City (Classixx remix) – I absolutely love Yacht but I’d never heard this song before and this remix is just out of this world good.

Class Actress- Journal Of Ardency – I heard this song ages ago and fell in love with it but sadly forgot about it. I’d been trying to remember it at the last few parties I’ve been at so I could play it to other people but I’d never quite be able to remember what it was called or who it was by. So so glad the name popped back into my mind the other night.

Julio Bashmore- Battle For Middle You – This Bashmore track got played more than a few times by quite a few different people, myself included. I recommend following him on Twitter actually as he’s pretty entertaining. Do so [here].

Siopis- I Try To Fight – We’d been listening to another Siopis track (Penny From The Lane, another track to check out) but it wasn’t until more people showed up that this basically went on repeat. I actually lost count of how many times we listened to it. It is *all* about when the vocals kick in at 3:53. Beautiful.

Sadly I’m not going this year but after reading the press release for The Common area I *really* wish I was. I love all the areas that are set up as they add massively to the extra-special magical atmosphere so unique to Glastonbury. Listen to how awesome this sounds….

Glastonbury Festival’s new Latin American extravaganza The Common is set to create the most talked about venue of the year – the Campo Pequeno, a giant outdoor bullring!

‘A sumptuous Latino playground filled with delights from the vibrant world of carnival . Home to twisted voodoo parlours, debauched bordellos, criminal party houses and a giant BULLRING complete with performances from major headline artists.’

The picture I’ve posted above is actually of ‘CopperDollar’, which according to the Glasto website is a “visual feast of Art, Music and Interactive Performance.” Sounds like exactly the type of thing I love discovering when trashed at a festival. Last year involves vague memories of an Irish pub that had U2-puppet-kareoke, trying to watch Teenage Bad Girl in Shangri-La at 2am, the amazing lightning fights and stage shows at Arcadia and spying Dalston sweatbox Vogue Fabrics transported into a field in the west country. It is those moments of oddball beauty that you really remember from Glastos past. For those going, enjoy and make sure you drop into the common and play on the wall of death (click [here] for awesomeness) and then eat a taco for me. Btw, I’m not taking the blame if you eat that taco first, alright? xx

***Image Courtesy of The Common***

UPDATE: Follow The Common on Twitter [here]

It’s birthdayageddon this Friday in Shoreditch with at least 3 of my friends all celebrating their birthdays at this secret warehouse party. The theme is Freddie Mercury which is handy for most of the male residents of Shoreditch as they won’t need to draw on their mustache having spent the last year or two preparing their facial hair for a night like this. Say what you like about Shoreditch (many do and will) but it’s my home and y’know what I kinda like it here.Anyways, it’s Club Cool [facebook group] in one room and Brits Abroad [facebook group] in the other. It will be MEGA.

This night will a. be jokes b. be messy as fuck and c. be awesome thanks to my pals The Dirty Toyz who are playing. Check ‘em out [here]. C’mon kids, come help us all celebrate. Super cheapo £4 tickets available [here] yes yes yes.

***Image courtesy of Chaz John Ross//Club Cool***

As what always happens with these things I’ve been epically busy organising work stuff and then dealing with the aftermath (press and whatnot) to the extent that I’ve been way too busy to blog. The Television X party at Cafe De Paris was, as you’d imagine a debauched affair and you can read interesting and differing accounts [here] and [here]. Oh and this happened as well- click [here] for a VERY nsfw pic. A ton of peeps got their picture taken with Billie from Eastenders like [this]. I, on the other hand, worked on the door and then got attacked by a branding board. Yay. Actually, I jest, it was ace fun but pretty stressful helping organising it. This [here] is my favourite picture of the night though as you can see me trying to not laugh as I explain to the Cafe De Paris staff *exactly* what Daisy and Kerry are doing on stage.

Check out my little gallery of pics of stuff what I missed cos I was too busy (make sure you click the second page of the gallery innit)…

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***Pictures courtesy of televisionx.com and Paul Smith from ETO Magazine***

My awesome friend Neon Skullz is throwing a kerazy birthday party next month in Dalston. It will be siiiiiiick if his previous parties are anything to go by. Don’t take my word for it here’s what he says…

“POW!

For the next party Neon Skullz has joined up with hardcore London Bashment selectors Shimmy Shimmy to create a very special vibe indeed.

It’s sweet little Rasta pub on Shacklewell Lane, Dalston ( about 3 minutes walk from Dalston Superstore ) with a massive back room, a fat sound-system and suitably lurid, tropical decor. There’s plenty of space for frenzied dancing and, well, you must know what to expect by now; insanely good music, surreal performance, art and riotous behaviour.

We’ll no need to imagine anymore because we’re bringing that fantasy to life! ”

And if that doesn’t convice you to click attending on this amazing event, here’s a picture of me from of the previous parties ‘Aztecs On Acid’ eating a baby’s head.

Photograhy by Gabriel Love

Syren Sexton’s *first* acceptance speech…

And her second…

Ric Porter from Portway Films with Damian Duke (srsly funny)…

And last but not least, Ms Kerry Louise!

But sssshhh! Don’t tell Kerry’s pooch Charlie he didn’t get a mention

Apache Indian’s eyebrows have a life of their own in this.

Is this one of the cheapest videos ever made?

It’s that gold bikini that makes this video special.

This video is an all-rounder. It has *all* the special elements that make these videos amaaaaaazing!

Honoury mentions go to Aswad, Inner Circle, Shabba Ranks, K7 and The Swing Kids, Snow and many many more.