***Advert placed on BGAFD***

Saw this job offer on BGAFD today and knew I had to share with all my little smut-lover-readers…

“If you don’t enjoy watching lots of porn, this isn’t for you…
OK, you’ve read this far – good!
At Strictly Broadband, we put well over 100 new movies online each month. This takes a LOT of work, as each movie needs to be checked, needs thumbnails added, and more.
We’re looking for someone who can regularly find a few hours a weeks to help with this task. You need a fast PC and fast broadband connection, and ideally some basic Photoshop skills. We pay for each movie that you prepare to go live on the web site.
Knowledge of porn is very useful, as you’ll sometimes need to identify girls on film.
It’s better if you’re close to London, so we can meet you at least once before you begin.
If this sounds like you, please mail me a brief CV.”

It’s a part-time position and you’ll need to email Jerry at Strictly Broadband with your deets

Sometimes a pornobabe, for whatever reason, decides a life of smut just ain’t for her anymore and retires into obscurity, either to the incessant dullness of an office job or the incessant perkiness of customer services. Either way our young former starlet will be hoping, nay, praying not to get spotted from her former glory days. This can be hard as what is committed to film and committed to the internet will never ever go away. No one will remove all your hardcore double penetration anal creampie scenes from their site just so you can walk through Hull shopping centre without getting recognised.

Poor old Julia Yalovitsyna suffered this fate harsher than most. The Russian marine biologist applied for the “best job in the world”, being caretaker for the Great Barrier Reef, and what with her credentials, it’s no surprise that she made it to the shortlist. Unfortunately for her, Queensland Tourism found out about her raunchy past as a webcam girl. Uh oh. They dropped her faster than you can say “former pornstar”. Which is a shame because she’s not only intelligent but she’s also really pretty and sadly this would have encouraged a lot of people to follow her reef-exploits.

Not so this outcome for RyanAir hostess Edita Schindlerova. The 22 year old supplements her no-thrills wage packet by appearing in pornos. She got busted by The Sun, no less. And RyanAir, in an unprecedented move of forward-thinkingness released the following statement:

“What people do before or after they work for us is their business.”

Obviously, this isn’t just happening in porn, but all over. Teenagers getting sacked because they wrote on Facebook that they thought their job was boring, new employees slagging off their company on twitter before they’ve even started to work, and benefit thieves’s living situations revealed by the magic of Facebook.
It’s going to be a steep learning curve for everyone coming to terms with the fact that what goes on the internet, stays on the internet.

***Watch the web-cam girl, er, webcamming***

***Image from Queensland Tourism***

Anyone that works in the corporate world will have eaten one. I’m sick to death of the taste of them. The “compliment sandwich”. Bleurrghhh. Does your boss not realise you know what’s going on? Do they not realise that by over-abusing this managerial tactic they are forever tainting the taste of compliments?
In this economic climate we need all the praise and motivation we can get. Times are tough, granted and we get that you want us to improve [read: keep the business afloat]. But, seriously, using this method means that employees swiftly learn that praise means jack shit. When praise is used as a buffer for what you fucked up, you begin to mistake any acknowledgment of your work-place successes as merely a precursor to your failings.
Employers: take note!
(on a positive note, if any one has any sandwich recommendations in the Charlotte St area, I’m all ears)